Gepfitbeg is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, dishonest hyena.

Gepfitbeg created a bottom quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepfitbeg, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gepfitbeg, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Gepfitbeg's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Gepfitbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always help squirrels.

4. Gepfitbeg loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.

5. Always help sick bats.