Honminstik is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, merciful squid.

Honminstik created a charm quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Honminstik, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Honminstik, it will curse you with boils.

Honminstik's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Honminstik's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never think ill of sick foxes.

3. Never talk about whales.

4. Never feed pineapples to bats while wearing green ear rings.

5. Never wear skirts.