Tonlarnteen is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, wise wombat.

Tonlarnteen created bats six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonlarnteen, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tonlarnteen, he will be very unhappy.

Tonlarnteen's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Tonlarnteen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Feed all hungry pigs.

4. Do not eat peanuts.

5. Never feed gooseberries to sharks while wearing violet jumpers.