Bessonttarp is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, slow wren.

Bessonttarp created Africa eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bessonttarp, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bessonttarp, it will be very unhappy.

Bessonttarp's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Bessonttarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about special relativity near tapirs while wearing purple shoes and balancing six silver spheres on your legs.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bessonttarp.

3. Never talk about quantum gravity near cats while wearing blue shorts and balancing three copper spheres on your feet.

4. Do not take Bessonttarp's name in vain.

5. Hide if four bats approach from the east.