Bestvinmin is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, merciful porpoise.

Bestvinmin created Mount Everest six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bestvinmin, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bestvinmin, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Bestvinmin's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Bestvinmin's Holy Commandments

1. Bestvinmin loves snails, so they must be respected.

2. Do not skip in public.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.