Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, tranquil dragonfly.

Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf created time and space seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf, he will turn you into a mouse.

Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics.

2. Never write about dark matter.

3. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bamtipkad Cussvigstaf.

5. Never think about special relativity.