Yognellwad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, unfair salamander.

Yognellwad created matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yognellwad, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Yognellwad, he will not care.

Yognellwad's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Yognellwad's Holy Commandments

1. Yognellwad loves snails, so they must be honoured.

2. Never paint your neck orange.

3. Never wear kilts.

4. Never write about quantum mechanics.

5. Never think about amino acids.