Volzenced is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, calm fox.

Volzenced created light nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Volzenced, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Volzenced, it will turn you into a duck.

Volzenced's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Volzenced's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick nematodes.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never think about eukaryotes.

4. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

5. Retreat if five otters approach from the east.