Vilhenjan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, awesome wombat.

Vilhenjan created the solar system two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vilhenjan, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vilhenjan, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Vilhenjan's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Vilhenjan's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Feed all hungry goats.

4. Hide if five squirrels approach from the east.

5. Never feed lots of oranges to moths while wearing indigo shoes.