Ditnellarm is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, moody hydra.

Ditnellarm created dark energy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ditnellarm, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Ditnellarm, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Ditnellarm's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Ditnellarm's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never eat grapes.

3. Do not speak about wheat.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never paint your arms turquoise.