Fidlatweg is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, self-assured camel.

Fidlatweg created the Sun six million years ago.

If you believe in Fidlatweg, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fidlatweg, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fidlatweg's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Fidlatweg's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Do not wear yellow clothing.

4. Never sing in the presence of tortoises.

5. Always treat foxes with great respect.