Betsagmanhughas is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, generous porpoise.

Betsagmanhughas created tapeworms eight million years ago.

If you believe in Betsagmanhughas, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Betsagmanhughas, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Betsagmanhughas' most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Betsagmanhughas' Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate frogs.