Stantailpid Ripflisrutt is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, flying rat.

Stantailpid Ripflisrutt created the Cigar Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Stantailpid Ripflisrutt, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Stantailpid Ripflisrutt, he will jump up and down on your head.

Stantailpid Ripflisrutt's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Stantailpid Ripflisrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Run away from turquoise porpoises, for they are unholy.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force near cats while wearing white coats and balancing four titanium spheres on your feet.

5. Fast once a month.