Ratbeptar is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, caring giraffe.

Ratbeptar created the world three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ratbeptar, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ratbeptar, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Ratbeptar's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Ratbeptar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

2. Always obey Ratbeptar's priests.

3. Never feed lots of cucumbers to porpoises while wearing violet shorts.

4. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near moths while wearing white skirts and balancing seven zinc spheres on your neck.