Rowbigbif is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unthoughtful frog.

Rowbigbif created the universe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rowbigbif, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Rowbigbif, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Rowbigbif's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Rowbigbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near bats while wearing white ear rings.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Rowbigbif on top of all buildings.

5. Never wear blue shirts.