Stanbafrill is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, benevolent jaguar.

Stanbafrill created a Higgs boson six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stanbafrill, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stanbafrill, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Stanbafrill's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Stanbafrill's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Stanbafrill in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always treat geese with great respect.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always make sure there are no dogs in a room before entering it.

5. Never feed lots of carrots to mice while wearing fawn coats.