Wigyimtit is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, all-knowing bird.

Wigyimtit created a top quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wigyimtit, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Wigyimtit, she will be very sad.

Wigyimtit's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Wigyimtit's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Feed all hungry great tits.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.