Kapbastcat is a god.

He takes the form of a small, tiresome bee.

Kapbastcat created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kapbastcat, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Kapbastcat, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Kapbastcat's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Kapbastcat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

2. Never talk about dark energy near doves while wearing red shoes.

3. Never look at dwarf planets.

4. Never wear coats.

5. Do not leap in public.