Lapfagged Gudxinjam is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, caring ferret.

Lapfagged Gudxinjam created a quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lapfagged Gudxinjam, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Lapfagged Gudxinjam, he will cry a lot.

Lapfagged Gudxinjam's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Lapfagged Gudxinjam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help cats in need.

2. Always help sheep.

3. Shrews are not to be trusted.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Always treat eagles with great respect.