Veenmabshavzog is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, self-assured hamster.

Veenmabshavzog created a strange quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Veenmabshavzog, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Veenmabshavzog, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Veenmabshavzog's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Veenmabshavzog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Always help pigs in need.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.