Farmilbap is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, moody rhinoceros.

Farmilbap created a quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farmilbap, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Farmilbap, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Farmilbap's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Farmilbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat grapes.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Farmilbap.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not make images of living things.