Fidtinpig is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, bad-tempered camel.

Fidtinpig created the Tadpole Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Fidtinpig, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fidtinpig, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Fidtinpig's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Fidtinpig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fidtinpig.

3. Never feed gooseberries to nematodes while wearing yellow coats.

4. Erect eight silver sculptures of Fidtinpig on top of important buildings.

5. Always help foxes in need.