Sigmiltab is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, compassionate warg.

Sigmiltab created a down quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Sigmiltab, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sigmiltab, he will turn you into a duck.

Sigmiltab's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Sigmiltab's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of ants.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not kill snakes.

4. Never talk about black holes.

5. Do not chant in public.