Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, two-faced zebra.

Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug, he will strike you with lightening.

Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Arfsakfob Gamnigventensug's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not eat beans.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

5. Do not listen to music.