Bidjamfod is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, competent mongoose.

Bidjamfod created the cosmos three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bidjamfod, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bidjamfod, she will boil you in a big pot.

Bidjamfod's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Bidjamfod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Put Bidjamfod first in all things.