Hudcutbembif is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, duplicitous lobster.

Hudcutbembif created the universe four years ago.

If you believe in Hudcutbembif, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hudcutbembif, she will boil you in a big pot.

Hudcutbembif's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Hudcutbembif's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hudcutbembif.

4. You must love Hudcutbembif.

5. Never talk about spacetime.