Yatyikmiphoggunwip is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, smart armadillo.

Yatyikmiphoggunwip created carbon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Yatyikmiphoggunwip, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yatyikmiphoggunwip, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Yatyikmiphoggunwip's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Yatyikmiphoggunwip's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Badgers are unholy and should not be approached.

3. You must love Yatyikmiphoggunwip.

4. Run away if seven pigs approach from the west.

5. Never sing near cats.