Cadkim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, clever owl.

Cadkim created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cadkim, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cadkim, she will come to you in dreams.

Cadkim's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Cadkim's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from mauve aardvarks, for they are unholy.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always stare at clouds.