Capstigweg is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, unthinking fox.

Capstigweg created dark energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Capstigweg, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Capstigweg, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Capstigweg's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Capstigweg's Holy Commandments

1. Erect five aluminium sculptures of Capstigweg on top of important buildings.

2. Never think about quantum mechanics near sharks while wearing brown shirts and balancing six iron spheres on your chest.

3. Never wear shorts.

4. Learn three new languages a year.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.