Yogrigkap is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, temperamental meerkat.

Yogrigkap created Europe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yogrigkap, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yogrigkap, it will curse you with boils.

Yogrigkap's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Yogrigkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention otters.

2. Never laugh in the presence of cats.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never think about dark matter near grasshopers while wearing magenta tights and balancing seven tin spheres on your legs.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.