Flatsterdiss is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, competent hippopotamus.

Flatsterdiss created the Cigar Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatsterdiss, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Flatsterdiss, he will turn you into a rat.

Flatsterdiss' most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Flatsterdiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.