Gatbassad is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, witless narwhal.

Gatbassad created life four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gatbassad, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gatbassad, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Gatbassad's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Gatbassad's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gatbassad.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Gatbassad.

3. Do not take Gatbassad's name in vain.

4. Never talk about planets.

5. Do not drink water in blue rooms.