Sawtadmif is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, self-confident troll.

Sawtadmif created the Cigar Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Sawtadmif, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sawtadmif, it will turn you into a worm.

Sawtadmif's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Sawtadmif's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Sawtadmif.

2. Do not kill turtles.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near dogs while wearing yellow trousers.

4. Do not dye your hair blue.

5. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.