Jatmilpid is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, contented goat.

Jatmilpid created parasitic wasps two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatmilpid, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jatmilpid, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Jatmilpid's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Jatmilpid's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Feed all hungry squirrels.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

5. You must love Jatmilpid.