Jigcetxuc is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, confident rhinoceros.

Jigcetxuc created humankind nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jigcetxuc, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Jigcetxuc, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Jigcetxuc's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Jigcetxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Jigcetxuc.

2. Never feed wheat to sheep while wearing hats.

3. Erect a giant black sculpture of Jigcetxuc in the centre of the settlement.

4. Pigs are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.