Dutbog is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, uncaring cat.

Dutbog created viruses two years ago.

If you believe in Dutbog, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Dutbog, it will turn you into a mole.

Dutbog's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Dutbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Bats are not to be trusted.

3. Never mention ants.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never feed lots of gooseberries to rats while wearing indigo dresses.