Yakvidsabpin is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, emotional crane.

Yakvidsabpin created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Yakvidsabpin, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Yakvidsabpin, she will turn you into a hamster.

Yakvidsabpin's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Yakvidsabpin's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at planets.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never think about ultrasonics near birds while wearing gray scarves and balancing three silver spheres on your hands.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Yakvidsabpin must be the most important thing in your life.