Wapcetham is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, wise hedgehog.

Wapcetham created the Cigar Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapcetham, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Wapcetham, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Wapcetham's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Wapcetham's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat bananas.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always help pigs in need.

5. Always make sure there are no swans in a building before entering it.