Vongettonkxuc is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, effective squirrel.

Vongettonkxuc created humankind two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vongettonkxuc, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vongettonkxuc, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Vongettonkxuc's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Vongettonkxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Vongettonkxuc loves gulls, so they must be respected.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Vongettonkxuc on top of all buildings.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never look at dwarf planets.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.