Nanpakflow is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthoughtful grasshopper.

Nanpakflow created the Sol system five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nanpakflow, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Nanpakflow, she will turn you into a puffin.

Nanpakflow's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Nanpakflow's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured birds.

2. Do not wear indigo clothing.

3. Never talk about thermodynamics near swans while wearing turquoise jumpers.

4. Run away if four great tits approach from the south.

5. Never eat green fruit.