Bitkinrull is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, proud hyena.

Bitkinrull created time and space eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bitkinrull, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bitkinrull, it will turn you into a hamster.

Bitkinrull's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bitkinrull's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Run away from orange gulls, for they are unholy.