Gomnutbatbif is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, contented coyote.

Gomnutbatbif created the Large Magellanic Cloud six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomnutbatbif, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gomnutbatbif, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Gomnutbatbif's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Gomnutbatbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Gomnutbatbif on top of all buildings.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.