Zenbapgidgeb is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, selfish centaur.

Zenbapgidgeb created snails four million years ago.

If you believe in Zenbapgidgeb, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Zenbapgidgeb, he will turn you into a goat.

Zenbapgidgeb's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Zenbapgidgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never think ill of sick eagles.