Somlopcisslog is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, sage crane.

Somlopcisslog created the Sombrero Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Somlopcisslog, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Somlopcisslog, he will laugh at you.

Somlopcisslog's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Somlopcisslog's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never eat lentils.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never think about quantum field theory near tapirs while wearing green skirts and balancing seven gold spheres on your head.

5. Always help pigs.