Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic pigeon.

Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Zogjenmut Nullnelltonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

2. Do not dye your hair black.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never wear skirts.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.