Sterrillgof is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, slow cow.

Sterrillgof created snails five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sterrillgof, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Sterrillgof, she will boil you in a big pot.

Sterrillgof's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Sterrillgof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never hurt great tits.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never write about spacetime.

5. Learn five new languages a year.