Matmetdog is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, tranquil shrew.

Matmetdog created a Higgs boson five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Matmetdog, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Matmetdog, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Matmetdog's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Matmetdog's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never wear mauve dresses.

3. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never eat turnips.

5. Pray towards the west.