Zagzagken is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, quiet giraffe.

Zagzagken created the universe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zagzagken, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zagzagken, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Zagzagken's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Zagzagken's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear magenta.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Do not drink water in green rooms.

4. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Zagzagken in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never feed strawberries to snails while wearing black rings.