Gatmegbed is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, ruthless newt.

Gatmegbed created the Andromeda Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gatmegbed, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gatmegbed, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Gatmegbed's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Gatmegbed's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Feed all hungry bats.