Sawnarlcid is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, irritating dingo.

Sawnarlcid created the universe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sawnarlcid, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sawnarlcid, it will turn you into a hamster.

Sawnarlcid's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Sawnarlcid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick gulls.

2. Always help sick shrews.

3. Sawnarlcid loves bats, so they must be honoured.

4. Always wear pink.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.